This is the time for you to care for yourself. This is not a party or reunion, its about YOU and what you need. Be very clear with those around you about what you want, and what you don’t want. This is your time to be loved and to have as few worries as possible. Nervous Nellies are not welcome!

Get genetic testing as soon as you can. Some of the best money you can spend to help make treatment decisions and plans. Kathryn Hunt at the Mayo in Scottsdale is your source for all testing.

You will receive huge amounts of information from well meaning people who know “someone” who had a “miracle cure” some place, or have a super nutritionist/healer/guru who told them never eat kiwi or only eat green foods, or whatever. Listen as you like, understand they are afraid and trying to make themselves feel better and help you, and then let it all go. Do what works for you. If you feel like getting up at 3am and drinking diet coke is going to cure you - do it. :-) if you don’t, don’t. This is a good time to get your boundaries squared away.

A big men’s button down shirt, and I mean big, is the answer to post surgery attire. Wear one to the hospital and have a few at home. With that you can go out and still have your drains safe but look “normal” there are some companies who make camis with drain holders, didn’t work for me but could work for you.

Sleep, rest, calm are so important. Give your body a chance to regroup.

The trick for treatment (chemo/rad, etc.) is to make your life about what happens outside the clinic, not inside.

Keep moving, no matter what. If all you can do is walk your driveway, great! Do it! If you can walk a mile, do that, swim, golf, tennis, move move move!

The first round of chemo, avoid your favorite foods. Then you have them to go back to.

Before you start chemo, cut your hair really short, or if you are brave, go ahead and take a clippers to it like GI Jane. It will make the fallout out less painful.

Eat. A lot. Chemo is the time to put on weight, not lose it.

Take all your meds, even if you feel like you are ok. You are ok because of the meds. Embrace them. If you have pain tell your doc and take your pain meds, they are your friend, not your foe.

Drink gallons of water, you should be hitting the loo every two hours. It gets boring but it is vital.

The chemo floor is a private place, while it is good to have support, no more than 2 people should come with you and at best one. Let those who want to do something cook for you, or clean your house, or rake your yard. Be respectful of your time there and of the others who are there being treated for a variety of cancers.

Your nails will turn grey/black. I couldn’t stand this so had regular mani/pedi’s to cover it up.

People ask about the timetable for chemo. Seems across the board, day one, get treatment, day two, nothing big, day three and four feel the most effects, and then up from there until the next round.

Even when you are bald, wash your “hair” and scalp.

Since treatment I can’t stand being in altitude. Same with my friends. No explanation. Let me know if it is the same for you.

Radiation has it’s own set of issues. If the machines bug you, just look at the floor, keep your eyes from darting around.

During radiation your skin will get “sunburned” and possibly peel off. Totally yuck. There are a few creams to try but basically you just suck it up and get through it. Best solution I found, gobs of whatever cream you’ve decided you like, your radiologist will give you a few choices, then put on a really tight Under Armour shirt and head out for your day, or night, or sleep. Keeps the swelling down plus keeps the tender skin from getting rubbed and rubbed.

if you had invasive breast cancer, or estrogen positive cancer, avoid soy products. Especially if you are taking tamoxifen or arimidex.

Get a really cute compression sleeve and keep it with you. If you fly wear it!

Be kind to yourself.